I am feeling very heartbroken, guilty and worried... Because I witnessed everything. That scene keep flashing in my mind, making my heart broke into pieces, again and again.

We went for *his friend's son's birthday celebration, I was feeling rather lonely because I do not know *his friends well, as in we know each other but I was shy so I always never interact with them. [Laughs]

But at least I have Ikssy to accompany me, and he was afraid initially and wanted to be carried. After some time, he warmed up a little and wanted to play with the balloons. So, I have to chased after him. He was the youngest among the children, in fact, he was a toddler and the rest are at least three years old and above.

Everything went well until....



The accident happend.



After feeding Baby his milk and changed his diaper, I can tell that he wanted to sleep. So, I carried him to where my bag was and wanted to give him his blankie and pacifier, but due to some reason, I had to search for it and carrying him in one arms made it hard to do so.

So, I put him down and told him to wait, which he usually will. But to my horror, he walked away! So, I took the things hurriedly and followed him, but it was too late. I only walked a couple of steps and I saw *his friend's daughter(running and talking to someone and didn't know Baby was behind her) knocked onto Baby and he was literally got thrown off and fell. To make things even worst, he fell on his side, head knocked against the leg(the rectangular, horizontal one) of the mahjong table.

God! I ran over and picked him up, he was shocked and then started crying badly. Took quite awhile to coax him. Everything happend too fast... And the poor girl felt so guilty that she knocked her head against the wall.

I know it was just an accident, no one wanted it to happen. And I know toddlers falling down and stuffs are very common. I don't blame the girl, really; In fact, she was actually a very sweet and pretty girl, kind and caring, I like her very much. A daughter you would want to wish for.

Of course, I feels heartbroken, nonetheless because I saw my son got hurt and crying in pain/shock.

I feels worried because he knocked the back of his head, head injuries could be a serious matter, no joke. So now I have to monitor him closely.

I feels guilty because I think it was my fault, due to my negligence and caused the accident. Even though I have been watching him like a hawk, I only turned my head away for one second and he had wander off.



My poor boy~


Sorry Baby...
I am such a bad Mummy... Yes I am.






Nothing must happen to you~
*Prays*




koob yrotsih ym April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 April 2011